Acceptable?


I am a single mom with two sons and am in my early 30's. My children are bright, talented and loving people, so I think I'm doing a pretty good job with them. I don't really have a desire to get married again, but I really want to have another child. Is it acceptable to ask a long-time friend to father the child instead of going to a "sperm bank"?

Answers:
I would discuss it with my sons first, and make sure they are ready to have a baby in the house again. If so, I don't think it would be a problem to ask the long time friend. You should also make sure it's okay with the friend, and his family. You will need to set up some rules though, like parental rights. Do you want this friend to be a part of the babies life? Be sure to be upfront about what exactly you expect. Good luck!

Other Answers:
u shud discus this with ur other children

Sure...I think that's perfectly fine! if thay are ok with it then YES but if he is married NO. if he aint ok NO


I'M SURE HE WILL THINK SO

no cause this will definitely cause a problem in the long run

no but you wouldn't want it to cause problems with your friendship. No, bad move.

Seriously.


You might be a great mother, but kids need the male experience. If your friend could give his sperm and that kind of experience, do it. absolutely not. unless you are willing to marry him. you shuoldn't have sex if you're not married. if you're desperate for a child, my suggestion is adopting one.


its not easy bringing up children on your own. you may meat some nice young man one day , why dont you have fun with your 2 children.
Source(s):
scooby.doo.

i wouldn't.

I think it's very acceptable.....you may need to set down some guidelines for it....like what happens if down the road you do meet someone and fall in love and maybe even get married.....you need to make sure that there will always be a place in the childs life for the long-time friend of yours....but i think that it would be a great thing. I would think the only person that can answer that question is you. Whether it is acceptable to society or not I would think lies in where you are in society. In the circle I am in I don't think anyone would bat an eye at having a friend father your child. The ultimate decision is yours and hearing of the wonderful job you have done with your children I have no doubts whatever you choose will be right for you.


NO WAY, that is nasty, you should want a father for the child with a guy that you truly love. You should wait and see what happens, if you get married and decide to have kids then that is great, if not be happy with the kids you do have.

You might be in for a lot of trouble. If you go to a sperm bank the father is anonymous and won't want to take responsibility for the kid or interfere with your education. Let the friend stay a friend, you never know what can happen if you extend the friendship to sex and parenthood. I would recommend strongly against it, there will be emotions involved that put a strain on that friendship.

No, because of the ethic and law. Your child could sue your friend as a parent and is perfectly legal. is he only going to be like a sperm donar or will he have parental rights too? If you can come to an agreement it should be fine.


Instead of having your own child, why don't you adopt instead? Your long time Friend my not be okay with this or he may feel responsibility for the child and want to become a part of the child's life after birth. I think you would better off adopting.

YOU SHOULD TALK TO YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT THIS. I THINK THAT YOU AND THE FATHER WOULD HAVE TO SIT DOWN AND DISCUSS IT ALSO. GOOD LUCK AND I HOPE IT WORKS OUT THE WAY OU WANT IT TO!
Source(s):
MOMMY OF 2 BEAUTIFUL ANGELS!

no, because it could cause problems in the long run between you. Well, I'm assuming you're REALLY close to your friend. But even so it could change your relationship dramatically. The father might become too attached to the child and fight you for custody or end up falling in love with you for the wrong reasons. Marrying you out of guilt and/or pressure from his family is another thing. Also I think its better for a father figure to be around and not becuase Im being mean its just that Ive seen kids without fathers. They are terrible and dont listen. But thats with an overworked mother... GOOD LUCK!!


That's a tough one. What about asking the father of your other children? I wouldn't ask the long time friend. He may be very pleased that you asked, but there are to many what ifs. If you really want another one you should really consider a sperm bank or adopting.

Well if thats what you feel you would like. If you are ready for another child then I would say go for it. Would your friend be in the childs life? Is the other kids dad in there life? Alot to think about, but go for it if the friend is up for it!

Why not, if you can take care of another child? Do you want this "friend" involved in your child's life; in your life? If he is the father he has a right to be so. And what about your other children? Do they want another brother or sister? And, most of all, why do you want a third child? Do you have an indestructible fortune, a large and helpful extended family to help in crises?

Think long and hard. But "acceptable?" To whom?
Source(s):
Personal experience and entrenched opinons only.


if that is what you want to do and you know that it will not scare him off but there is a chance that it will you just need to be prepared to pay for another child and you cannot expect him to help you if he does not want to be in the childs life i kinda think that it is unfair to the child not to have a father in his life I wouldnt do that because I would be afraid it would mess up our friendship, but I guess If he is ok with it and you have thought about it well, then go for it.


I would consider what impact this might have on the long term friendship, you children and the child to be conceived. There are many things to consider. 1)Do you plan on having sex rather than artificial insemination? (Sex could complicate your friendship.) 2) Do you expect him to be a part of this child's life? If so can biological father accept the prescribed role? Can he is not going to be a father figure in the life he was a partner in creating if that is your choice? 3)How will the biological fathers involvement or lack of going to affect the child and his siblings. The future what "ifs" seem to be the biggest problem. Because of the com placated issues that could evolve from partnering a child with a long-time friend, I think I would go for the anonymous sperm bank donor.

If hes willing to do it and your children are ok with it.



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