should i feel insecure about my fiance playing daddy to someone else's baby?

He wants to have a baby but i'm not ready, because I have a year of school left. His friend just had a baby and the daddy isn't involved so he wants to be there for her. I'm scared that in the process of being a "father figure" to someone else's child, he'll develop a bond with the mother that we don't have. He doesn't understand my feelings and he thinks that I only want to be involved to "keep an eye on them" I feel like it would be different if me and the girl were friends and I wasn't being left out. How am I supposed to handle this? Am I being selfish?

Answers:
If being a parent is important to him, and he is important to you, then get involved. Be genuinely interested in your support, maybe offer to help when he can't. Be a friend to the mother as well and become a part of the 'family'.

If you remain resistant to your fiance's wants and needs you are only driving a wedge between the two of you and he will likely find that he can find the support he needs elsewhere. But, being supportive shows your 'good side' and who knows -- it can be good practice for you for when you decide to have a child of your own.

Other Answers:
you are not being selfish at all. i see exactly where you are coming from. I understand that he wants to have a baby around and he wants to be there for that baby. but if he wants to do that then he should involve you in that babys life as much as he wants to be. If he doesnt agree or at least try to see where your coming from then maybe this guy needs to realize how serious you are, it might be a good idea to find all this out now before you marry someone who doesnt care about your feelings.

its wrong unless you both are involved in babies life. This baby will bond with him and he will vanish one day to be your kids daddy..thats just emotional cruelty..if you both made a commitment to be in this baby's life as serogate family ..then it would be ok if you didnt up and abandon that kid...heres what ya do ..buy the baby a present and go introduce yourself and explain to the mom your worries

I wouldnt like that at all. there is a large chance she will fall for him and show it. if he doesnt want you involved that is really bad too. thats not right, i would put a stop to it.

i would never let my man do that

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should i feel insecure about my fiance playing daddy to someone else's baby?

Pregnancy & Parenting