How do you punish a Masochistic child?
Example, we put him to bed. He gets up. He gets about 3 or 4 warnings as we lay him back down. He still gets up. I then start spanking him. The second I leave the room, he is up and coming out again. Its like he enjoys the spankings. My kids never did this as they werent spoiled, so I am now at a loss, please help.
Answers:
I go through most of this with my 3 year old twins every time their daddy leaves (he's in the military). For bedtime put a baby gate in the door way so he can't leave the room. He may scream but what I do is just turn the TV up louder and check on them every few mins to see if they are still awake, and to make sure they are not hurting themselves. For meal time get a booster seat that has a seat belt and use it. Even if he doesn't eat he can sit there with the rest of the family. If he screams about it just ignore it. For bath time make him take a shower with you that way you can hold him. As for the potty I don't know what to tell you on that one.
I know this sounds harsh but when you are at your wits end you will try just about anything. It works on my kids it takes about 2 or 3 weeks for them to understand that you aren't playing games at these times, and that when you tell him to do something he needs to do it.
I don't think you are expecting a 2 year old to behave like a 5 or 6 year old, like someone else posted, I think that you are expecting a 2 year old to behave and not act like a baboon.
Other Answers:
It sounds like he feeds off of your attention. Perhaps you should try something that won't give him so much attention.
You might also try counseling.
*** You are his step father, right? Or, did he just recently come to live with you? I took a Child Development class in college which taught that young children have a hard time adjusting to a change in his or her household makeup. Perhaps if he just recently started living with you, he is confused or unsure about how to act around you. Maybe it will get better with time, but I would guess that if it has been a while, you would need to ask an actual professional, or do some research on it if you can't really afford to take him to a therapist.
I disagree with the other answer, though. I believe that kids learn basic, core habits at a young age. I would not just "let it go," because it might grow into a more serious social/behavioral problem later on.
Just my opinion. Hope you get it worked out.
He is looking for attention. Some attention is better than none. Quit swatting the child, read to him, sing a lullaby be there. He is a baby, I think you are expecting a 2 year old to behave like a 5 or six year old. He is very small, we expect too much from our kids and all they want is some love and attention. Swatting his rear hard hurts and makes him dislike bedtime. Bedtime has to be happy and pleasant.
Add on -
I am sorry you did'nt like the answer, unfortunately in an open forum you have to get answers from people like me.
For a while think for the child. He is perhaps afraid of you, perhaps he hates beign forced. All that he wants is some patince and understanding, he needs kindness and not smacks. Remember you are the adult here, and you are dealing with a 2 year old.
Sorry for the advice, but, someone has to think for the child, who from the sound of things is getting abused. A hard smack is abuse.
What does he enjoy? Is there a certain toy, activity, or TV program that he particularly enjoys? If so, try taking this away as a form of discipline. The child is very young and time out is not going to be that effective at such a young age. I believe that spanking is never in the best interest of the child, especially at such a young and impressionable age. He still a baby; maybe you're being a little too strict with him. Try engaging him in other activities. I got you covered.
THIS WAS MY CHILD!
The baby needs a ritual. A concrete..bedtime is on its way ritual.
And the one reader is right..the child is looking for attention..good or bad...attention is what they want.
We solved the bedtime fight (and almost all the other power struggles) with routine. We have dinner..then clean up, play a game or go for a walk weather permitting, dance the hokey pokey, have a pots and pans parade into the tub.
There is tubbys, then stories (2), prayers and bed!
We let him keep a light on in the hallway and 2 books in bed with him.
The first week or two you do this..you may still get him getting up...but gently tell him to go potty..no more to drink and back to bed. The first time he is up I put him to bed..after that he has to go tuck himself in.
It may even help if you stay upstairs or near his room in your room..putting laundry away or whatever for 5 or 10 minutes..until he gets used to the routine.
Children crave attention. They also NEED to know they are safe and loved and what to expect.
Source(s):
Good luck.
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