I have a 3 year old boy... I need some advice.?

When my son was 6mts, we moved in with my husbands parents. Their son (my brother-in-law) is 12, and has disorders, and he can not control his behavior. He yells and screams, and is very rude. My inlaws do NOT disipline him cause he wont listen. Now my son is 3, starting a new preschool, and is taking toys away from other kids and he is hitting and bitting, and also wont listen. My husband and I have tried everything that we can think of to help our son to understand that this behavior is not good. But he wont listen. My son looks up to my brother-in-law. I just could use some advice on what we could do to get this behavior he has picked up corrected. We have limited the amount of time our son spends with his uncle and grandparents, could this be a way of acting out cause we wont let our son see them? Some advice please, for a first time mother!!

Answers:
I had a similar problem when my oldest son was 3 and an older cousin (5 yrs old) visited for the summer. The cousin ordered my son around, talked back and name-called incessantly. He wasn't really disciplined either. My son of course thought his cousin was hilarious, and imitated it. I was strict from the get go with time outs and loss of toys and even a smack on the butt when he said "I'm gonna kill you!" after hearing his cousin say it earlier. I was really striving to nip it in the bud. But older kids are a big draw, and I'm sorry to say that it took months of zero contact with this cousin before the name calling and rudeness stopped. It was like it would pop out of his mouth and instantly he knew it was wrong, but it was a bad habit. When we next saw the cousin and brattiness ensued, I made it a point to tell the cousin how rude he was being even if it was uncomfortable for his parents to hear. And I also made an example of my son when he again imitated and said within earshot of the parents "just because he does it, does not mean it's ok, that hurts people's feelings". Suddenly the parents began disciplining my cousin.
You might try telling your brother in law how rude he is being when your son is there listening, and even if the bro-in-law doesn't listen your son is, and you might even then quietly say to your son something like "big boys shouldn't act like that, it's not nice. I'm glad you are being so nice" before he has a chance to think the behaviour is cool.
It's doubtful that your son's behaviour is that he's mad about the limited contact. Kids are just big sponges at this age. If you haven't moved out already, try to find a way to, these are your son's most impressionable years and have an impact on the rest of his life, sometimes big changes are needed.

your son could be imitating what he saw his uncle do, or he could be stressed from the uncle's behavior and acting out on his own. i do think you should limit contact with the uncle, and deal with your own son's behavior. it's up to your inlaws to help their own son, but if they aren't doing it, don't let it hurt your child. i read a book called "the explosive child" and it's about how to deal with kids for whom regular discipline isn't working. some kids don't respond to punishments. hopefully your son will calm down. good luck.

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I have a 3 year old boy... I need some advice.?

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