HELP!! I have a fit-throwing 3-yr-old.?
Answers:
Stop being so fickle. At this age pick something and stick to it.
Time-out.... how long is the child in the corner looking at NOTHING and doing nothing...no talking humming or singing...no moving...no dancing....no twisting around .... NOTHING!
If these conditions aren't met then the time starts when they are!!!!
3 year old with a bad temper needs 7 min
withholding certain thing..... you don't withhold it you take it away....he/she gets it back at least a month from the time taken.
Explain to the child they can get it back after they demonstrate for a week or whatever certain time or situation that they can control their temper.
If they can't follow the rules to get something back then you taken another thing away!
Do not be afraid to "upset the child further".
Stop snacks and candy unless it's a special occasion-like a birthday or something!
Remember who is the parent in this relationship!
Get a hold on this problem NOW or plan to start paying for it in the future!
Other Answers:
when my son was little and threw a tantrum in a store, i threw one back at him... no more fits!
susan
Have you taken her to the doctor? I did and my daughter was diagnosed with autism! It"s always better to be safe than sorry. A professional can really help out!!! Personally, I would just say she is going through a phase where she is feeling needy and requires immediate attention, kinda like how my sister was, and sometimes still is at age 5 almost. It also depends on the severity of the fits she throws. I would say that corporal punishment is too early to make an impact on her anyway and should probably not be used. By the way, keep in mind that this is coming from the perspective of a 17 year-old in a Psychology class.
He thinks it's a game, so if you just ignore him, then he'll realize it's not so much fun anymore. Then he'll stop.
Good Luck!
Source(s):
5 kids
Ignore him until he calms down after he calms down talk calmly with him and ask him why he did it and will he please not do it again. If he does do it again just completely ignore him. Don't even talk to him.
Source(s):
Not so far from being that age If she doesn't have autism or any other mental disorder, then walk away as soon as she starts crying. Don't pay any attention to her when she throws her fits. Dr. Phil says that when a child is naughty or bad, take all of the things they have from them but the bare necessities. Make them earn their toys back. Another method (if you can afford something like $15 a month), is to make your child EARN ten nickels a day. Every time she is bad...take a nickel away. When they realize it's time to get their nickels and they don't get to many, then they will notice how "bad" they really were. If she wants things like candy or toys. Make her pay for them with her money. Basically, the nicer she is, the more things she can buy herself. Just an idea.
I know that it sounds a little 'Super-Nanny" but Honestly the "Naughty" seat or rug has really worked well for me. It was hard at first but once I got firm and went down to eye level with the child and looked "as serious as I can" and said "No your not doing.....(Whatever) because of (whatever they just did). and said "Now you will sit her in on the Naughty Chair, Rug, stair etc. (whatever you have)what is best is if you can go and get something new like a little $3 plastic chair or a small circular rug or something and you take the baby with you to get it and when you are buying it explain the whole way there and all in the store what the purpose is and a reminder when you pull it out at home as to what it is "This is where you sit, when you have not been good or when you have done something naughty. Let her feel included in the fact that you are serious and Never ever bring the chair or rug out unless she does something bad. its not a toy its not to used or played with at anytime needed or not (it should not just be left out in general site). that way the association of "OH..THATS THE BAD CHAIR or Rug" or whatever will be Clear. and the thing is DON'T LET UP, Never let her see you sweat. Don't chastise her then pacify her, Remember she only gets 1 minute for each year of age (But Trust me she understands Much more than you might think) so 3 minutes unless you know that she may need like 5 minutes per mistake, but leaving her there too long gives her time to forget what she did. So when the time is up, go back down to eye-level and ask for and apology and remind her why she's apologizing then she can go back to playing or whatever its time to do. But don't let her get up! Everytime she gets up her 3 minutes start over and you don't reward her by acknowledging her crying while she's sitting or if she gets up from the seat ahead of time don't reward her with communication (it gives her , her way in to her Goal "Acknowledgement") reaffirm why she is sitting there the first time that she gets up (each time she has to sit there) but if she gets up more than once NO TALKING, Just pick her up and put her back on the seat until her time is up, it may take several occasions of Naughty ness but if you truly keep the chair or rug separate, the very site of it will remind her of restrictions. Sorry that I was so long winded but I hope the this information was at least somewhat helpful to you.
Source(s):
My Own Daughter and The Biggest and baddest Kids from suburbia and the Ghetto and worked on all of them!
Mine is 2 and he's so bad! I've even tried everything I can think of. I asked the doctor and he said it's normal, until he hurts himself or others. You can ignore it, or put them in their rooms, it sometimes helps and sometimes it doesn't. Corporal punishments, time-outs, withholding privileges, and rewards do not work because they are not a logical or natural consequences. They only cause resentment and shame. The punishment needs to fit the crime when disciplining. i.e., If the child is being destructive with a toy, the toy gets taken away. If the child makes a mess, they clean it up. If a child is screaming, they get put into an area where they can scream until they're ready to stop.
When your daughter throws a fit, get down to her level and say "I do not like when you (explain what and why)." Take her gently and calmly to a place away from you (her room, the couch...) and say "When you are ready to (calm down, listen...) then you can come back with me." This is not time out because you are not setting a time limit (you controlling her). She returns when she is ready to control herself. It may take several tries before she gets the message. Be consistent and patient. When she returns calmly, tell her you appreciate her behavior.
Empathize with her "I can see that you are (angry, upset, hurt, mad, frustrated)" whenever possible. This will help her to learn words to express herself rather than throw a fit.
Set limits and follow through. Pick you battles. "No" should mean "No" the FIRST time you say it. Offer choices not chances. If you offer a chance the child will come to expect another and another. Say "Yes" as much as possible. Good luck!
Source(s):
Preschool teacher (12 years experience)
M.A. Child Development
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