Is it wrong to spank a defiant 2 yr old?
Answers:
you only spank because you are angry NOT to teach a child a lesson it has no point or meaning wats so ever accept to let you get your anger out, i have 3 children and have never spanked any of them, at 2 they are just frustrated with life and take it out on whom they not only love the most but trust the most, i always found putting them in time out and then wen they had done there 2 minutes (a minute for each year of there life) that i always went in gave them a hug and asked for a sorry if no sorry or still screaming put back in for 2 more, also are you stuck in a rut are you only noticing there bad behaviour? as any child craves attention good or bad which is the secret to a great child reward the good ignore the bad, do a sticker chart for every 20 mins they are goosd they get a sticker, my bible! wen all of mine were young was the toodler taming book by doctor christipher green its fantastic try and but it and read it it will change your attitude, try your hardest to not spank it really is not the way to go and try and enjoy them they are only young once good luck mate xxx
Other Answers:
As a last resource, spanking is ok as long as you spank "gently". You don't want to injure your child. And you don't want to spank too often or it will not be effective.
i dont think so i spank my 2 yr old.... and it works... i count to 3 and if he dont stop i spank him.. he learns fast... I took a class on child abuse(not because I am abusive) I am actually a victim of spousal abuse, I am not studying it so that I can help other victims. That's beside the point
In the class we were taught by a police officer and he would ask us various questions and ask if it was abuse or discipline.
There is no harm in spanking your child (of course you are going to have people disagree with me) It is harmful if you spank him/her so hard that you leave marks, that is child abuse. It is child abuse if you use a belt or a coathanger. I am not saying that you will (trust me) I am just giving you and example.
Just spank the child enough to let them know that you mean business. Sometimes spanking is what it takes. Believe me, it is going to break their heart quicker than it is going to break their bottom. ;) They will know that you mean business. Chances are good the behavior will stop. If the behavior continues after SEVERAL spankings, then you have a problem and should talk to your pediatrician. ;)
2 year olds are by nature defiant. they should not be punished physically, especially for something they can't control. heres what i think if you smack a child it teachs to hit when they are angry do you remember when youre child hit his friend for taking his toy and you told him its not nice to hit ? well then why hit him it only teachs its ok to hit you say dont but then hit youreself think of that . now ii am not saying a smack on the hand every once in a while dont hurt but just spanking in general dont cut it for me . i do time outs even with my 10 yr old his are different then my 2 yr olds but time out is time out.
no actually they are like that at that age but at first try the corner. people say that it dosen't work but make them stay there even though they scream and try to run but they will learn fast that bad behavior means corner
ifind that in discpinjing my child amild spanking just makes him laugh. rather than gonig at im with seveere spankings timeouts appear to be far more effectiveWow --you are going to get a lot of opinions on this one--I've found that spanking a child hurts you more than it hurts the child (guilt) I found that putting my daughter on a "time out" worked very well---there was a few times when I "swatted her behind" and I didn't have the heart to keep going or hit harder---and the swatting didn't seem to phase her but sitting in the corner in a chair for 5-6 minutes alone was way more effective and a lot less emotionally damaging to me and to her--I think that spanking a child isn't the answer--"time out" worked well for me and also when she got older--she didn't like having to "sit out" while all the other children were playing--- No its not wrong at all in fact a defiant child needs that.The Bible says spare the rod spoil the child.
Source(s):
Proverbs Proverbs 29:15 says the rod of correction imparts wisdom,but a child left to himself disgraces his mother. Proverbs 29:17 Discipline your son and he will give you peace.
What is the need of spanking a 2-yr old kid. What purpose does it serve? What do you gain by doing so?
A 2-yr old toddler still cannot properly tell what is right from wrong. They still always depend to our guidance. You cannot tell to this kid "you're grounded" cause it would not mean anything to him or her. Kids at that age learns fast by their experience. Pain is one way for them to learn about what is ok and what is not.
I personally believes that spanking the kid does not necessarily means "child abuse" but just a way to correct them and make them realize that what they are doing is wrong.
i have spanked both my boys since they were that age. just be sure you don't get out of control. count to 3, give somekind of warning, try a little timeout and if all else fails spank him. i'm already paddling my daughter who is 19mos. old. she doesn't like to listen much at all lol. It depends on your definition of a spank. You should never hit your child above their shoulders (ie not neck or head) and should not hit them hard enough to hurt for more than a short amount of time.
It might also help to look at your motives. Are you spanking to vent frustration or to physically teach them that a specific behaviour is wrong?
Pick the child up, walk away to a quiet place and hold/rock/restrain your child until they calm down and then explain to them why that was wrong and better ways to deal with it. Toddlers are impulsive and are learning many new feelings - frustration! - they need your guidence...what happens as an adult in another frustrating situation? Are you going to be there to spank them when they loose their cool? No. So you need to teach them how to keep control.
I've taken care of spanked children...they end up in physical fights more pften, they are angry, confused and hurt. I started to use 'my' way of dealing with them and their parents were amazed by their good behaviour and attitudes.
EDIT: I cannot believe the parents on here who spank their babies who are under 24months! Of course they don't listen, they are babies!
Source(s):
Prof. Child Care Provider and a Mommy. Some kids it works on and some it doesn't.
You have to remember one thing, though. Kids learn by example. If you deal with frustration by hitting people, then the kid will learn to deal with his frustration by hitting other people.
I was not spanked much when I was a kid, because just the threat worked on me.
I have learned, so far, to control my 2 year old Son with my voice. I have had to spack his hand a few times when he would not stop messing with something, but I have been able to make him stop doing things by just telling him to stop doing it.
I have not had to smack his behind yet. Spanking only instills in a child that hitting is okay especially when someone else has done wrong. Why would anyone want to teach their children that?
When your child does something they are not supposed to, the first time tell them no, and tell them why.
"No honey that is dangerous" or "No, Danger" will even work.
Then if they continue say it again. The third time, take them away from that area all together and put them on time out. At two its going to be hard to have them just sit in a corner or on a chair. And you dont want to use a space that they use all the time like a high chair or crib because that will make those places seem negative to them when you use them for your everyday things. I'd suggest a playpin or a baby gate that blocks a hallway. Something that says I'm here because I broke the rules. Then let them be on time out for a few minutes. At 2 I'd say no longer than 3 minutes 4 at the most. As you can see from the number of responses, this is a controversial issue. ...and only YOU can decide if it is "wrong".
I don't buy the "spare the rod" example since the "rod" in that context was the stick used by shepherds to control their flock of sheep/goats...and they didn't hit the animals with it, they used it to guide them. HOWEVER, I do think that spanking can be an effective means of discipline when it is used appropriately!
As for me, I've always had strict guidelines for spanking...deliberate defiance of my reasonable authority is a spanking offense in my house...he doesn't get spanked for mistakes, for childish irresponsibility or poor judgement...but when he repeatedly chooses to disobey me when I tell him to do (or not do) something, a spanking is a possibly consequence.
My son got his first spanking at about 2. The key is staying on the right side of a very thin line...if a spanking doesn't hurt, it isn't effective...my son laughed at the first few until I learned a way to make his butt sting a bit without using much force (all in the wrist *smile*)...but hurt enough to cause an injury of any kind is too much. Experts differ on whether you should use your hand (which may confuse the child when mommy's hand is associated with nuturing and with pain!) and using an object such as a hair brush or paddle (which may cause injury)...I use my hand so we are both feeling a little sting when it is over.
I'm big on the value of letting children learn from the consequences they experience...I protect him from consequences than can seriously hurt him but in other cases, I simply point out the consequences to him and let him choose. Every time I've ever spanked him, he knew before it happened that if he chose to continue what he was doing, a spanking was the natural consequence...of course, I combined spanking with other consequences...the spanking only came when the other consequences didn't get his attention (or aggravated the situation...e.g., don't hit the dog or I'll take away your sword then I take away sword and he hits me or throws something at the dog). Now, at five, I only have to ask him what he thinks will happen if he continues down the current path and he suggests the consequence without prompting (e.g., if I refuse to turn off the xbox when it is time for bed, I don't get to play xbox tomorrow, if I hit mommy when she tells me I can't have a treat, I'll get a spanking). Fortunately, spanking has become somewhat rare now since he doesn't feel as much need to test my resolve...he knows that I'm serious because I always follow through.
My advice is this...before you leap to spanking for the first time, take a good hard look at what you're currently doing in the way of discipline...if you are inconsistent, if you don't ALWAYS follow through, then adding spanking to your discipline repertoire won't help! Start smaller...pick a punishment you use now (time out) and try using it consistently...you may find that it does the trick!
Baby steps...focus on one issue at a time to make it easier for you to be consistent and for your child to learn the rules...for example, I had problems getting my son to go to bed when I told him to (among other problems)...some reflection revealed that I wasn't always consistent...I'd say bedtime in five minutes and sometimes give him 10 or 15 minutes...I'd say that if he argued he would lose a favorite toy for a day and not follow through when he cried. I decided to focus on that one issue...I told him that I would give him a 10 minute warning about bedtime and when the 10 minutes were up, he needed to go to the bathroom without arguing. If he argued or whined at ALL, he wasn't allowed to watch cartoons the next morning. If the arguing continued after that, he got a spanking. It took a spanking the first night then a week of no Dora in the mornings for him to realize I was serious...and it was easy for me to be consistent because I only needed to focus on one behavior and one punishment! I then expanded to other issues, one at a time! NO!! NEVER AT ANY AGE IS IT OK TO HIT YOUR CHILD!!!!!!!!!!
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