Mother-in-law help?


Okay so my 2 year old went spend the weekend out of town at her maw-maws ....my mother-in-law. Well she told me she trimed her bangs, of course she not a hairstylest so I knew I was gonna need to get my mom the hairstyles to fix them. Well OMG when I seen her a few min ago....... She didn't trim them...she Cut them... and they are sooo choopped up...pices all over that didn't ever get cut... and now you can see half her forehead their really short. I am sooo mad. I am so tired of her doing stuff without asking me. I told her it was fine that she had trim the bangs, (altho she told me after she did it so I had no choice) but i do not approve of this HOW DO I CALMLY tell her I am upset. I don't want to be mean, but she should have never done this with out asking me and now to fix it my child is going to look so goofy! HELP

Answers:
I have spent the afternoon thinking about this one...if you are up for being just a bit coy, how about this?

Take a picture of your poor little girl with those god awful bangs really emphasized. Include it with a thank you card to "maw-maw" for letting her spend the weeked. Include a note that says something like, thanks for a weekend I'll never forget. Here is a picture for you to share with all your friends. Write on the back, my first bang cut from "maw-maw" with the date (imagine what all of her friends will say about the cut)...then ask your daughter to draw a picture of her favorite for "maw-maw" and write an explanation of the picture. There is no way she can't get the point, and yet your covering it with so much sugar, she really can't get mad.

In the meantime, next time your daughter is going to "maw-maws" let mom in law know that you will be taking pictures again, so you had her hair "trimmed" in advance. That should keep her scissors away from your babys beautiful hair.

You poor thing, yes the bangs grow back but unless you make it clear that you are in charge of cutting them your kid could come home from every visit looking like a freak. She will eventually associate the two, and that won't be good. I wish you the best!

PS, don't make a huge deal to your hubby...that won't help you handle this "diplomatically"!

Other Answers:
omg...i understand ur upset but it's just hair..it grows back...just get over it...u already told her it was ok so no point in bringing small stuff like that up

That's rough!

Gotta use pins to hold back hair. Take to salon for advice.

Maybe cut back on weekends away without child for awhile so that there is no opportunity for bad situations to arise


Tell your Mother-in-law that she's not to do anything to your daughter unless you are there to monitor her. Ask her how she would feel if someone did that to her son? Tell her that you are upset that she choose to do this with out your consent. Tell her that a daughters haircut is up to the mother and child not the maw maw. tell her that there are things that she can do for your daughter like take her places and stuff but that when it comes to things like haircuts it up to you to do these things. Though it is too late now to change the hair cut she should apologize for it. Tell her that its not fair of her to assume she can do this without your consent. Just speak calmly and rationally. Tell her how you feel in an even tone. Tell her that you love and respect her but she should respect you as well. Tell her not to do something like this without asking first . Stress that point because she may try to fix it with out you. Just be honest with her about how you feel. Good luck.


After you calm down, I'd go to her and tell her how you feel. Explain to her that she is YOUR child and BEFORE she does something like that again, you'd appreciate a phone call first. Tell her that you take your daughter to a salon for haircuts, and invite her to attend the next haircut.

If you keep having problems, then I'd monitor the visits and make them shorter!

Good luck!


She probably doesn't think she did anything wrong, so anything you say to her is going to get her defensive...but you've got to say something anyway. It sounds like this isn't the first time she's done something like this, and if you just steam about it without saying anything it'll drive you nuts.
AFTER you calm down, invite her over for coffee or lunch, without the kids around, and just tell her the truth. That it bothers you when she does things to/with your children without discussing it with you first, that the two of you may not have the same tastes in haircuts/food/clothes/whatever... to be calm and DISCUSS it rather than be mad at her, and hopefully it'll go OK. It might not, she might get offended and defensive -- but you've got to say it anyway. It's the things that aren't said that cause the most problems, by discussing it at least she'll know how you feel and there will be a chance to resolve it. Make sure you have your husband's backing (her son) before you do this, if he takes her side it'll never work :)

Good luck!


This is something your husband needs to discuss with her. He has to tell her that it was nice of her to do that, but in the future, before making any decisions like that, to ask the two of you first.

You're right that she didn't have any right in the matter and I'd be furious too.


It is rough. I am the foster mother of two wonderful little boys. We have to ask permission to cut thier hair and one of the mothers decided that she knew how to cut hair and shaved this little boys head. I was pissed as was the transportation specialist. There was nothing we could have done, but I did tell her that since we were the foster parents that it was our responsibility to keep him trimmed up that we didn't mind spending the money. My suggestion to you is that you tell her that it upset you and from now on, just tell her that "your child" has a "date with your mom on Tuesday to have her hair trimmed" and just pass it off.

Good luck! Some Mother in laws can be much worse!
Source(s):
Mom of foster kids
daughter in law
Mom of own kids I had the same problem with my step mom. I just sat her down and said... I appreciate all you do for me and my son, but I would really like it if you could please call me and let me know before you do something! hopefully that works!! it did for me;)



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