HELP!!!18 Month old out of control?
Answers:
First of all, trying to potty train an 18 month old boy is like teaching an elephant to fly. Odds are, it won't work.
As for his development, an 18 month old ought to know a few words (10-25 on average). I can promise you that while your friends little girl may be able to repeat the words "one two three four", she is not actually counting and probably does not understand what it means.
Kids temperaments are all different, but my 3yo son has been "hard headed" like that also. The key is being consistent. This is the age that time outs can be effective, but remember he will continue to test you for years and there is no quick fix. You just have to be consistent in disciplining him and don't let him get away with inappropriate behavior. Time outs should only be a minute per year of age. And while he may act like he doesn't care, eventually he will get tired of going to that little chair and will start correcting his behavior.
Being consistent with discipline also defines boundaries for him. Some of the worst behaving kids are those who have no clue what the boundaries are, or they are so inconsistently enforced that the kids become frustrated and act out even more.
Just be consistent with it. It WILL get better eventually. And wait on potty training until HE is ready and starts to show interest.
Other Answers:
you been to soft with him from the begining you must start letting know whos the one in charge and he must obay mummy show lots of love but also firmness in your control of him hope you sort you problem out good luck
First of all, all babies develop at different rates. Just because your son does not talk, does not mean anything, most children that age are still figuring language out.
As far as his behavior, he probably will respond better to actions than words. When he does not do something you ask, show him what you want, take his hands in yours and together do the task, telling him, this it what mommy wants you to do. And anytime he does do what you ask, praise him VERY HIGHLY. Even if you don't ask him to do something, and you see him behaving nicely, PRAISE HIM for that. When he is quietly playing with his toys, tell him, say, "look how nice you are playing, what a GOOD boy". Positive reinforcement works wonders. When he is doing something he should not, just remove him from that and tell him we don't do that, or we are finished with that now, then let it go and engage him in a preferred activity.
Hang in there, honey, he'll be OK and so will you!
girl im goin through the smae thing.. my son is 2 now. i run home daycare, all the children r so good and my boy is a terror. he dont listen, wont share, and now im trying to break him of hitting and pushing. most boys are hard to raise as small children but easier when older. girls are easier when young, but harder when older. look at it that way. just keep your cool and stay firm, let him know know your boss.
Source(s):
SELF Don't sound so regimental when you tell him NO. Explain why he can't do a certain thing. He is probably just testing his boundaries. Be firm, but not too stern. I'm sure you're a good Mum. Give him plenty of ineresting stimulation, sing songs together, dance, get him some inexpensive eduational toys. Watch his eyes light up.
He is completely fine. I have a 2 year old who was the same way. Just try to have patience and keep working with him. Is he cutting teeth by chance? My son was going through a really bad phase like this and it turned out he was cutting 4 teeth at once. I don't think it is just a boy thing because my other son never acted this way. Also, don't worry about the potty training thing. It is a waste of time and laundry to try to train a child before he or she is ready.
He's 18 months old. He's basically still a baby. Potty training is out of the question, he's way too young. Swatting his hand is an ineffective punishment in my opinion, because it clearly doesn't work, and if you're not careful it can escalate. At 18 months, distraction can help--if he's doing something he shouldn't be (not "bad", keep that word out of his hearing), then show him something he *could* be doing, or make a funny face, or go get him and tickle him silly till he forgets what he was doing. Then give him another activity. Very brief time outs (1 minute per year of age) can work too. And language development in boys is slower than girls. My son had 2 words at 18 months and over 100 by 2 years old, as well as numbers, colours, letters, and shapes. The next 6 months will bring about an explosion of language and behaviour. Enjoy it, don't focus on his negative behaviours.I think you're expecting too much of an 18 month old. I recommend an excellent book called Your Baby and Child by Penelope Leach. Her section on toddlers has helped me more than I can say--she puts everything in perspective. Good luck.
I am not an Expert but I think you and your husband should chat more often in front of the child.
The child learns speaking from parents. Try to spend more time with the kid. Watching TV (Family serials & Commercial advertisement) in front of kid also helps.
Rather than just telling him no and giving him a swat, try redirecting him. Keeping him occupied will cut down on mischief.
For example, involve him in household chores: set him on the dryer or other surface nearest the washer when you do laundry, and let him toss small garments into the water; let him help load or unload the dryer. Put him on the counter when you wash dishes and let him play in the water. Give him a rag, too, when you're dusting, or a paper towel when you're cleaning windows. This will keep him busy and in your line of sight.
When you have to tell him "no," you should really take the time to explain to him WHY he can't play with whatever he's playing with: "No no, baby, that's for big people, and we don't want you to break it. We have to be very nice. Can you put it back for mommy? GOOD JOB!" Then you make a big deal and clap your hands & saying "yeaaaaaaa" really loud. If he's climbing, you need to take him down off whatever he's climbing, and explain to him that he could fall & bonk his head & have a big owie. Redirect him to toys, and when he wanders after something else, go to him and tell him, "No, that's not a toy. (again) That's for big people," blah blah blah. "Where are your toys? Can you show mommy your toys? GOOD JOB!"
When he's playing in the trash or toilet, go tell him, "Ewwwwwwwwww that's yucky! Don't play in there, that's for potty," or for trash, whatever, and take him to a sink, and show him how to wash his hands.
By taking the time to explain things to him, you also encourage his verbal communication. Ask him questions, prompting him to repeat what mommy said: "What happens if you climb up there?" [fall down, bonk my head, owie] "Is that a toy?" [no] "Who is it for?" [big people], etc.
Try warning him about a spanking before actually doing it: After you've redirected him 3 or 4 times, THEN you can take a more harsh tone. Say his name & be sure you have his attention, and tell him mommy said NO, and we need to go find TOYS to play with. See if he will show you to his toys again, and on the way, direct his attention to the forbidden object, and tell him if he does it again, mommy's gonna spank his butt. The next time he makes a beeline for it, catch him in the act (but NOT before he gets there), pick him up & swat him without warning, and put him in his room, crib, or playpen for a time out. Let him scream. It won't kill him to be secluded & mad for 10 or 15 minutes. Just be sure to snuggle him a little when you bring him back out into the "fun world," and ask him if he's ready to go play or help mommy, or whatever's next on the agenda.
As for his speech, whenever you're wandering around the house cleaning or cooking or whatever you do, sing the alphabet song loud enough for him to hear you, and some other songs, like Itsy Bitsy Spider, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, etc. Show him "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes," and stuff like that. He'll enjoy it and want to sing with you. Once he becomes a bit more verbal, then try to have him repeat you counting to 5 or 10 until he can do it on his own.
Believe me, 18 months is NOT too young to learn all this stuff. My oldest was very well-behaved, well-mannered, and said her ABCs and counted to 10 by that age.
Oh, and speaking of manners... say please and thank you just as much as you would expect him to, and prompt him to do the same. It'll help with the talking. And I think boys are a little slower with the potty training, so spend the next 6 months trying to tighten up his communication skills before you even bother with that. You might even get lucky & see him become interested in the potty on his own.
As you can see by reading the many responses you've received so far, your son seems to be pretty normal for his age.
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