What should I do about my ex-husband telling our children lies about me?

My ex is continually telling our children lies about me. Trying to make them angry with me. I divorced him because of abuse. He is telling them that I divorced him because of an affair which is not true. Part of me wants to tell the children the truth, but I think they are too young and I don't want to lower myself to his standards. We are now going through another court battle over placement because he cannot get the children to school on time. It is affecting the childrens education. Our children are a girl age 5 and a boy age 7. Since I started this court issue at the teachers request, he has begun to tell them all kinds of things that are not true. He calls me (not very nice) names in front of the children and does everything he can to try to convince them that I am a home wrecker and that he did nothing wrong. I am not blaming him for the divorce and don't want to come between the relationship between our children and him. I just want him to stop lying to our children.

Answers:
This sounds very similar to my parents divorce case. It lasted nearly 5 years and was UUUUUGLY! I always respected my mother so much because she held her head high through it all and walked with dignity. She would correct untruths without becoming emotional and laugh off rumors. If this man was abusive, then I suggest you get counseling so you can gain your self-respect back. When you are calm, self-assured and confident people will not be fooled by his lies.

Good luck in your court case. Remember that he is your children's father: do not bad-mouth him in front of them. THAT would be sinking to his level, not trying to correct the lies. DO try to get the teacher on your side using whatever means necessary. She is your greatest asset in your case. If you have any evidence of abuse (hospital visits, pictures- think really hard- were there Christmases you had bruises, scratches, or black eyes) now is the time to rummage that up. GET THEM OUT OF THERE! He has no business caring for children. If you're not there to take the abuse (even verbal abuse), who do you think will get it now? God Bless You.

Other Answers:
i dont know if its possible but can u ask court to not let him see ur kids or something like that

take him 2 court r if u want 2 do sothin like madea if u luk at her shows my advice is always good tell your kids the truth I think that they can handle it.

Talk to the court and ask that he seek counseling. It sounds like he needs some serious help. I don't think it's wise the children be in his custody without supervision. You can sue him for slander, because he is altering the perception of your children by lying about you. He is affecting their development psycologically. Dont' put your children through this. They have been through enough if they had to watch him abuse you.

Best of luck to you.

I am in a similar position. Wait. Wait. Wait.
One day the truth will come out. It's hard and will not get much better for many years to come. Our children will find the truth and appreciate the love that they have missed.
Source(s):
A parent in the same position

unfortunately thats what happens when you get divorced.
You can ask the courts to do a custody investigation, That helps the court decide where the children should live.
Be careful about what you do though, the courts can really complicate things for you and order counseling (some court counselors are really crappy too!) and some investigations can become bias.
Its best if you can just let your kids know info on the basis of do they really need to know.
So many times kids get caught in the your dad is, your mom is, they said, she said etc.
Never say anything bad about your ex to get even.

As they get older they will see by your actions who you are.
If they ask specific questions give them honest answers.But only as much info as they need to know.
Be careful your ex will never change.
You should never have left your kids with him.

I know exactly what you're talking about...I have 3 girls (7,5,2) and my ex does the same thing and I divorced him for the same reason and he is saying the same thing that your ex is...I still haven't figured it out...but it would be nice to know. I went through the same thing during my divorce.
Now that my children are older, they know he told lies.
They have very little respect for him or his parents now.
I never said anything bad about him to our children, only listened to them & told them the lies wern't true, that daddy must have me mixed up with someone else.

1. Tell your kids that daddy is angry with you and that the things that he is saying are not true. Daddy loves them but he is so mad at mom. Dad is using angry words and these are not the kinds of things that mommy would do. Try to get the school counselor or principal to help with the tardiness issues.

2. Go to court or counseling to stop the lies. Be honest with them about why you got a divorce because they have a right to know the truth.
Talk to your divorce lawyer about what's going on and see if he or she can change the visits to supervised ones only and explain to him or her what's going on.

Let him tell the lies. Time will show who is the honest parent, and your kids will respond accordingly to him as they grow up.

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What should I do about my ex-husband telling our children lies about me?

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